Self Confidence

Your self-confidence is inherent, it is an intrinsic character trait that we all have!  We as children are all born with it. Sometimes it just needs a bit more practice or needs to be learned.   Small actions each day improve your confidence. 

I often discuss NLP (Neuro-Linguistic-Programing) as a tool for building self-confidence.  NLP is a powerful tool.  Learning about the “IALAC” is a helpful method to assist in understanding the life effects on self-confidence.   All humans are born with a wonderful “IALAC”  a feeling that “I Am Lovable and Capable.”  We are challenged because as we grow up, other people and events in life chip away at our IALAC.  Search the web for a variety of stories regarding “IALAC”.

The best part about building self-confidence is that it will retrain your brain to learn positive new ways of thinking and believing.  The challenge that you have before you is to stretch your thinking and actions beyond your comfort zone into areas of self-assuredness.   With each small action your confidence level will exponentially and vastly improve.  Self-confidence seems short?  Here are a few thoughts on bringing out your best:

·         As simple as it seems: SMILE - a smile fools your brain into thinking everything is Okay.  A smile often causes another person to mirror our expression.

·         Improve your posture.  Stand up and sit up straight - It makes you appear more self-confident and feel more self-confident.

·         Keep up appearances.  Take care of how you look.  Dress sharp and in style.  Good grooming works wonders for the soul!  When you look your best, you feel more self-confident.

·         Keep a card in your wallet with a list of your skills, abilities, past successes, and talents.  Take a look at this list when discouraged or feeling down… it is sure to lift your feelings. 

·         Spend time with positive people. 

·         Write a vision, set goals.   Once it is written down you have begun the process of creating it.

·         Challenge your thoughts.   Accentuate the positive – eliminate the negative

·         Work on the brain and retrain it.  Negative thinking becomes habit.  Rewire your brain by intentionally thinking new and positive thoughts, at first it may even feel awkward.  Read about NLP,  build a vocabulary of positive words.

·         Challenge each of your fears.   85% of all worry is just for naught.

·         Learn from mistakes.   Plan a quick pity party and then let it go. You are a new person.

·         BUT…  Focus on the present.  Focus on the task at hand.  Be so involved that your mind is happily engaged.

·         Do something for others.  Always be in “Pay it forward” mode.

·         Call in reinforcements.   Read a self-help book.  Take a class to help you improve your self-confidence.  If all else fails and you have issues from the past that you can’t resolve, seek the support of a counselor to expedite the changes needed.